I
know that "I am personally called by Yahweh." I know that
Yahweh has formed me and guided me from my earliest years. This I have
never doubted. During my four years at St. Francis de Sales School [Morgantown,
W.Va.], I came in contact with many Ursuline Sisters. The one that had
the greatest influence on my life was Sister Sylvester Alhaus. She was
an intense person, a marvelous teacher, one who spurred my love for
learning and left a deep impression on my life. Periodically she read
excerpts from novels to us. Fabioli was my favorite. When I heard "…one
stroke, one bound, Pancratius dies no more," I knew I had to do
something great for God - Facere Deo magnum rem became my motto. What
did God want me to do? Would I follow Father Damian to Molokai? These
young people were being "thrown to the lions," and they accepted
it. My Lover was calling. He was saying, "Come then, my love, my
lovely one, come" (Song of Songs 2:13.) I did not understand, but
I dreamed. As I look back I know that God guided my every step.
A
student who sat in front of me in class had a paper which she showed
to me. Sister Sylvester had said something to her. She was going to
Louisville, Ky. to be an Ursuline Sister. That's what I would put on
my paper. It wasn't Molokai but it seemed the next best - a possibility
within my reach!
June
29, 1925, at age 14, I boarded the B & O train in Morgantown, W.Va.,
for Louisville, Ky., to be an Ursuline Sister. I knew very little about
the congregation and its works. I knew the Sisters taught school but
that was not my reason for coming. I never even thought about being
a school teacher. I had to do something for God and this seemed to be
what He wanted me to do.
The
choice was very difficult. I went 600 miles to a strange land; to a
people whose culture and practices seemed strange to me. I left Mamma
and Papa, a kind and loving home with children ranging in age from 2-12
and Margaret 18. I spent many a lonesome and homesick hour but I had
made the choice. I knew it was what God wanted me to do. I was sure
of that. I would not leave this spot until I was carried out. I feel
very strongly about being buried from the Motherhouse chapel. It was
the thought that sustained me during those lonesome hours some 70 years
ago. There were some bright spots. Mamma came in September. The entire
family came the following summer for my reception. Then I met some kindred
souls along the way.
The
bright spot was-
My lover had taken me into His banquet hall,
And the banner He raised over me was love,
He fed me with raisin cakes and restored me with apples,
His left hand under my head and His right arm embracing me.
(Song of Songs 2:4-6)
What
did I bring here with me? Certainly not wealth. Not a list of accomplishments.
My parents planted seeds. Enveloped in the Ursuline Community the seeds
would germinate. This is what I see that I brought-
1.
A deep, quiet, sensitive nature with an awareness of and a sensitivity
to the rights and needs of others
2. Zeal for the spread of the Kingdom
3. A love for learning and an inquiring mind
4. Courage to stand up against injustice
5. A burning desire to do something great for God
These
seeds were sustained and nourished, but it wasn't easy. "Unless
the grain of wheat fall to the ground and dies, it remains alone."
There were many little deaths.
With
the Ursuline Sisters there was an educational life and a professional
life. Intertwined with this and woven into it was my life with God and
His impact on my life. This is the stuff out of which our stories are
made-yours and mine. Our story is God's story.
